Thursday, August 26, 2010

Conversations with God ... I mean, my Knee

Yesterday's caterpillar on driveway

The caterpillar I saw inching across the driveway yesterday morning was a message to slow down. My right knee also delivered a similar directive. Suddenly, out of the blue, while sitting in a meeting the day before, it had started to hurt intensely. By the time we left, I was limping.

I had damaged that knee years ago in my late teens. I was at a toga party at a friend's house, we were all dancing and, before I knew it, I was on the ground in pain (ligament injury). I was on crutches for a while after that, hobbling around at University. Despite that, I've never had knee issues, so yesterday's pain was a new experience. So much for doing Sat Kriya in rock pose that morning ... and this morning.

Rather than see physical pain as that only, I ask what I always ask: WWLS (What would Louise say?) This link lists the spiritual meaning underlying various diseases/ailments/injuries (based on Louise Hay's work). When I look at what "knee" signifies, the part about 'lumps of undissolved anger' resonates most. Whether current anger or past anger, whether at self or other, whether conscious or subconscious, if not properly expressed, thoughts and emotions can linger.

So when I woke up yesterday I spent some time with my knee, giving it Reiki and speaking to it. Through my knee, I forgave myself and I forgave everyone (for nothing specific. I kept it general to cover all possibilities). I then asked my knee to tell me what it wanted me to know.

Throughout the day I got the message that I need to slow down, do less and be more and take better care of myself. These messages are true and timely. In spending time with my knee, covering it with my hands, stroking and massaging it, talking to it, envisioning light going into it, etc., I realised that we (most ... or all humans) barely spend time with our full bodies, checking in to various body parts, asking how they are doing, what they would like from us, etc. My knee must have been basking in the attention I gave it yesterday. When a body part is not in pain, we use it unthinkingly, going about our business and taking it for granted. When it is in pain, we focus on it—naturally, because it is crying out for that attention and, at the same time, holding a message for us.

Early September will mark a year since I (reluctantly) returned from Toronto. At the time of going there, I had been 100% raw for 1.5 years. Once in TO I enjoyed what Trinidad doesn't have: a wide array of raw food ingredients, organic produce (affordable, diverse & plentiful), one or two raw food restaurants and, even if I did eat cooked or baked food (which I did eventually), it was healthy. Upon returning to Trinidad, suddenly, in comparison, the meagre options were disappointing. Needless to say, my raw food lifestyle gradually slipped out of the window and became more of a junk food, grab-what-you-can-and-eat-it-as-you-go-about-your-day lifestyle. Apart from the odd moment, gone were the days of spending hours in the kitchen lovingly making sumptuous raw meals for myself.

I can safely say that when I was eating raw, it was a great example of self love—slowing down, spending time for myself, taking time to artfully design my meals as if for someone really special (as is the case), naturally not feeling any desire for processed foods and junky treats, etc. I don't do that anymore.

Yesterday, my knee reminded me of this time of self love and loving-raw-food-preparation and signaled the need to return—if not 100% raw, definitely as the majority, with no processed junk. I felt as though the pain in the knee was also an accumulation of toxins—even something as simple as flour and dairy products. So yesterday I didn't eat anything processed. I listened to my body and consumed what it was calling for: sweet potato, carrot, water and Yogi Tea.

I also slowed down my body and mind. I read one of the books I had ordered from Amazon a while ago, I slept, rubbed my knee, gave myself energy treatments and didn't think about or become immersed in things-to-do.

By evening my knee was miles better. It's still not 100% itself, but I will continue to listen to it, be more conscious of my thoughts and feelings, be gentle to myself on all levels and adjust accordingly. Will also monitor and see if a visit to the osteo is in the works.


Lynn Cohen said...

I hope your knee is okay now and stops giving you negative messages of any kind!
Love the photo of the c a tapillar.

Elspeth said...

Thanks, Lynn.

Unknown said...

Great message. Whole unprocessed foods are indeed the best and most nutritious options. Like you said it's a struggle maintain such a diet here in Trinidad.